the expectations of love.

Love comes with certain expectations, doesn't it?

     You want to be charished. 
                 You want to be romanced. 
                              You want to be desired. 

When you're single it's unfathomable that these expectations will not be met when you find "the one".
Here's the thing, when you're single you have these ideals about waht you think marriage and love will be like.

- You'll have many wonderful, spontaneous dates
- You have the most romantic, intimate proposal the internet has ever heard of
- You get married in the most elegent wedding dress to the man of your dreams
- You move into a beautiful starter house with your hubby; a home where you will one day raise your children

I may be no expert on love by any means, but I do know that marriage and love is nothing like that. Loving another person is hard work; it's a struggle.

In a perfect world, this is what real love looks like; the type of love we should all strive to give:

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. Love never fails."

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

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I'm gonna let Hannah Wofford, guest blogger over at be.loved blog take it from here:

After reading that is doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out the reason our expectations of love go unmet. Being patient and kind and trying to not be envious or boastful is hard. Honoring someone and choosing to be selfless takes sacrifice. Keeping your temper in check and not holding grudges is a struggle. In reality, we have no right to have any expectations of love because we can’t meat anyone else’s expectations.

So to all my single ladies:

I encourage you to lay down your expectations of romantic love (excluding the expectation to be respected as a woman and not abused or taken advantage of – I need to make this very clear – always expect that). Try to abandon the expectations of how you think love should go. Instead of seeking a man who fits the bill of the latest chick flick hunk, seek a man who strives to live out 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. He won’t always meet your expectations but he will try and that will mean more to you than his failures.

Happy Easter to all my fellow single gals.

xoxo

love like the movies.

So you want to be in love like the movies?

             Not only is this a catchy title to my little post, but this is also a song by the Avett Brothers (a favourite of mine).

Check it out here.

It's a pretty solid tune.

So my question to you ladies is this: does 'movie love' really exist?

            I once had someone say to me that we (ladies) shouldn't watch romantic movies of any sort because if gives us false expectations of love. While I think this to be true, I don't think this would stop the problem. If we stopped watching movies like The Notebook, P.S. I Love You, or Dirty Dancing would the false expectations of love cease to exist? Probably not. Do we not get infatuated with the love stories in Disney movies - Aladdin & Jasmine, Hercules & Meg, or Ariel & Prince Eric? And how about those fictional characters that we so love to read about - Elizabeth & Mr. Darcy, Romeo & Juliet, or Gatsby & Daisy? Stories of love are all around us as our culture is infatuated with the idea of finding true love.

         In real love stories does love really conquer all? Does the guy and the girl always end up together? Is one big romantic gesture really all it takes? 

          Do we need to block out any movies, television shows or literature that promotes a false sense of what love really is? I don't think so. If we are lucky to find love stories that honour God's guidelines for love (1 Corinthians 13:4) I think we should celebrate them, not boycott them. Does that necessarily mean that it will come true for us? Not at all.

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         Love is nothing like it is in the movies. But, luckily we have some exceptional guidelines to follow. Our heavenly Father has provided us with something to strive for in our love relationships.

What do you think?