This past semester at school I had to write an independent study paper on the topic of my choice and how it relates to sociology (and really, if you know sociology, EVERYTHING relates to it!) So I chose to look at singleness, as this was a topic that greatly interested me (thus, where the blog came out of; I found I had a lot to say about the subject that didn't necessarily relate to the class - so, here we are!). I studied some articles that looked at singleness and the church, and I came across this article that was entitled Choosing Celibacy by Marcy Hintz. Here's a quote from the article:
“Christians are familiar with Scriptures such as Matthew 19, where Jesus speaks of "eunuchs" who have "renounced marriage because of the kingdom of heaven," or 1 Corinthians 7, where Paul writes, "It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am." Singles, Paul said, are "concerned about the Lord's affairs—how [they] can please the Lord." Evangelical pastors justify the celibate life with those passages, but hardly ever promote it as a desirable calling.”
I just thought that this was such an interesting statement. We find the Apostle Paul to be a strong advocator of the 'single life', and the church teaches this, but do we really believe it? Do you find the church celebrates and promotes marriage (and family) more than singleness?
How do you take this statement? Do you agree? Disagree?
I'd love to hear your thoughts on this!!!
**UPDATE - If you are looking for some further posts on this subject????
\You should check out what Becca has to say at My Life as a Christian Single in her post A Message to the Church on how to Care for Your Singles - it's really great.
**UPDATE - If you are looking for some further posts on this subject????
\You should check out what Becca has to say at My Life as a Christian Single in her post A Message to the Church on how to Care for Your Singles - it's really great.
I totally agree with you, that although the church teaches about Paul and his advocacy for singleness (although it usually doesn't come up in too many sermons), I believe that the church absolutely celebrates and promotes marriage more than singleness. From talking to you and reading your blog, gave me an idea to write a sociology paper on young marriage and the transition from becoming a daughter into a wife. The church is made up of 'marriage naturalists,' who are those people who believe that marriage is an inevitable process after a certain period of time of dating. It's difficult to follow in Paul's footsteps of celebrating the 'singleness' of a person, when that never really happens in our church community. When a couple gets married or even engaged, it usually gets announced in front of the church, and sometimes followed by congratulations and wishes from the congregation, and also, sometimes some cake and fellowship following the service. I know I might be rambling on this a bit...but it's something that I never really noticed until I was 'sucked into.' Love you:)
ReplyDeleteI know! It's such an interesting statement.
ReplyDeleteI never really noticed it until I read this journal article. Our society has been programed to think that marriage is a step in life that all people go through (or SHOULD go through). I'm not saying that marriage is bad, it's just narrow-minded to think this way as some people never get married.
I like what you said about marriage/engagements in the church (definitely something I thought about when I wrote this). Saying 'congrats' to a couple is inevitable and encourages that couple, but to go so far out of your way to celebrate their "accomplishment" of marriage or impending marriage, just oppresses those who are single.
Does this make me sound bitter? I hope not (cause I'm not)!! Thanks for your post.
V. intriguing!
ReplyDeleteI think that Christians have an tendency to sort of idolize marriage - the "perfect" marriage, the "perfect" family - like it is an end in itself, like it is the goal we are supposed to accomplish.
And the fact is singleness has a negative stigma - "so what's wrong with you?..." (ha ha ha...)
I certainly don't mean that marriage and family isn't wonderful... it is! But I think we don't want to talk about singleness as a lifestyle option because it TERRIFIES us - we don't want it to be an option.
But we are to "rejoice with those who rejoice" so we are happy when people get engaged, etc. It sort of does make me (hmmmm... maybe I am a little bitter :{...) angry when people attribute worth to you if you've managed to, like, "get engaged"...
Ah well, it is the Lord's plan not ours. And there's so much to be enjoyed as singles! Honestly!
I guess it all comes back to trusting Him...